Welcome to In Reverence.
On this series we ask 10 questions about self-care to folx we hold dear, honoring all kinds of voices and their Self Ceremonies.
We’re interested in digging into the ways self-care has helped people evolve past their own blocks, trauma and social conditioning. We believe in the deep healing path of vulnerability and compassion and how this can help us enrich our beautiful community.
For this edition we're honored to welcome Kailyn Lynch, founder of Redefining Our Womanhood.
1. Tell us a little about yourself, your name, your pronouns, where you live.
Share a small bio to help us get to know you.
My name is Kailyn Lynch, my pronouns are she/her and I’m originally from Southern California living in New York City. I am the Founder and CEO of Redefining Our Womanhood, and Founder and Curator of The Vault Library.
2. When did you start taking conscious care of yourself?
I started taking conscious care of myself unfortunately when it was almost too late. In 2017, I was diagnosed with clinical depression. The unbearable symptoms I was experiencing from the depression is was prompted me to seek professional help. Looking back, the most important lesson I learned from that time was to never let my mental and overall health get to such a low point before addressing it. Now, I prioritize my spiritual life, mental health and physical health daily; which for me has been the most loving thing I can do for myself.
3. What is your definition of self-care?
My definition of self-care is being consistent with the routines, rituals and habits that are constructed for the betterment of my being. I take an a holistic approach to self-care; meaning tending to my physical, mental health and spirituality.
4. In your experience, how does self-care relate to community care?
For me, self-care and community care often go hand-in-hand. I’m a firm believer in people working as an ecosystem. We’re all here to support, love, grow and learn from one another. I’m fortunate to have a such a loving community of my family, friends and even those I have never met who constantly send me love. Giving and receiving love is what I’m here to experience in this lifetime.
5. What is your current favorite Self Ceremony? How does it feel, smell, look, taste like?
My current favorite self-ceremony is taking baths. They have become a part of an intentional effort in creating moments of stillness for myself. I soak in my baths with darkness and candle light, a diffuser filling the space with lavender essential oils and nothing else. Whatever comes up in that moment I give permission to be released. A prayer. Crying. Meditating. Singing. I am still finding comfort in learning how to be with myself fully and my self-ceremony baths have been my sanctuary.
6. How do you know when you’ve been slacking on your self-care? How do your red flags look like?
It’s the moments of overwhelm when I know I’m not using my tools. It is such a physical, mental and spiritual difference between myself and when I forget who I am. Where I am now, it has been a blessing to feel as deeply as I do. My bodily reactions and emotional responses alert me when I’m not okay. I think the everlasting process of self-care is meeting your ever-changing needs.
7. What is your inspiration to continue doing what you are doing? What is the fuel that keeps you going?
What keeps me going is my understanding that my life’s purpose does not start and end with me. I know I’m here to give love, encouragement and help others carry out what they are here to do. Both the journey of my personal life and career continue to take me places I have never expected; but, the guidance, information and tools I receive from the Source is what inspires me to keep going.
8. What have you learned this past week / month? What are you getting better at?
In this moment, I am learning that there is no need for me to rush, panic or seek control. It’s a process of connecting to the truth that God is fully in control, and I am only called to show up. There is no room for me to show up, be an empty vessel and flow in my purpose when I am seeking to control. I am leaning into resting in my faith that what God has for me is mine, and I am being guided by divinity.
9. Tell us a fun fact about what you do, or something people may not know.
Something people may not know about me is that I never planned to do any of the things I am doing professionally. My higher education is in Psychology, and worked to become a clinical therapist. While in school, the more I began to accept myself and trust in life I ended that career path. Now, I am leaning into not necessarily aligning with any title.
10. What’s the best advice you’ve been given? Or what is your message to the world?
My best friend taught me the power of loving self-talk. In the past, my inner world was full of self-hate, harsh criticism and negative put-downs towards myself. The ways in which I spoke to myself in the past really highlighted how I was treating myself overall. Now, I am very conscious of being gentle with myself. Loving on myself. It may seem so simple, but it has changed my life in every way. Practicing self-love is my way of aligning with God and how God loves me.